How does it feel to lose the one you love

November 30, 2017 § Leave a comment

How does it feel like?

Like shit.

I loved him. He was my first love, my one, my soulmate.

It felt like someone reached within me and pulled my heart, my lungs, my stomach, my liver -everything- out. I laid everything bare, and inside I was empty. My head hurts, my heart breaking.

It wasn’t his fault, nor mine.

We just wanted different things in the future. And in a sense, that got in the way of a really good relationship.

He showed me how it felt like to love, be loved, and what it was like to be in a relationship. He taught me how to be jealous, and how to control it. How to get upset at each other, and how to make up afters. He taught me how doing nothing can be fun.

I didn’t want this to end. But I didn’t want it to get sour where we resented each other for not giving in.

I rather he cheated, hurt me or even hated my friends. But he didn’t. And that’s what made it worse.

Will I get over it?

Of course. But like death, we grief. This relationship died. I can’t help but mourn for what could have been.




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