Au Contraire

November 30, 2012 § Leave a comment

Just the other day, my friend- sorry, one of my BEST FRIEND- was telling me how relationships should be easy breezy. Y’know, how everthing should just fall in place.


You see, my philosophy is that it doesn’t matter if you or you’re ‘soulmate’/friend etc have everything in common or nothing in common at all. If you really love that person, you would MAKE it work.FIGHT for it to work. I mean if that person means so much to you, you won’t just let them go so easily,right? It definitely would be ‘easy breezy’ if you’re gonna fight for this love.( Cue cheryl cole music… Okay bad pun.)

Which is why I totally disagree with her opinion. I mean just like that show ‘Fugitive Plan B’; where in one episode where they were spying on a couple making out, and the girl said,” They must be happy, since they kiss so passionately.” Only for the guy to reply,” No their not. Happy people don’t kiss like that. They kiss as if it was their last(kiss/night together/connect dots yourself).” And it was their last night together.(trust me, I watch the damn show.)

Sooo, yeah my point is totally supported. Well, kind of .(why did I mention fugitive plan b again???)

BUT the thing is, my relationship with this friend( as mention up above) is kindda ‘hard’. LIKE we barely have anything in common leading to us always disagreeing with one another, despite her being one of my besties. Which is why after she said what she said( the whole easy breezy relationship), it got me thinking. Our relationship is DEFINITELY NOT easy breezy, we had to put a lot of effort to make it work and sometimes its JUST SO TIRESOME. I get annoyed easily when situations occur and we have completely different views on it. Just like a typical headstrong person I would support my view to the end and so would she. And we would argue- or debate, whichever suits you better- till the world ends.

So what does this make her? A hypocrite? Since she said all relationships should be easy and yet our own relationship is proof of the opposite. If so, what about me? If she’s a hypocrite won’t that make me the same too? I go on and on about how it doesn’t matter whether people in the relationship are similar or completely different, and yet when I have to work- or fight since i mention that earlier- for the relationship to work I get so drained and bothered making me not WANT it to work so it’ll all just end.

I know, bad thought:s. But sometimes an easy breezy relationship is just much less tiring. Or maybe we’re still in that phase where we haven’t learn to compromise- though i doubt so since we knew each other for YEARS- and once we do, it’ll be alright.:)

I’m not saying my philosophy is 100% right, but I did put a lot of thought into it and NO i would not test this out on my relationships because i’m not freak scientist like Darwin.(how he used his own daughter as a test subject was inhumane despite him just making observation and not exactly dissecting her and shyte.)

So, I guess we just have to sit out this ‘phase’ and enjoy pleasantville after that.


xxxxxxxx,(cause I don’t do o’s)


1nov2014- it’s so funny now that I’m reading this because I did give up and we barely talk anymore. Lol


solution to emotions

November 9, 2012 § Leave a comment

Why, hello there.

It’s been, say, months since I last updated this blog:0

NO WONDER it’s so awkward.(to be typing…on this blog..)

But none the less, helloo.

huh, really really awkward..

Sooo, I’ll just get to the point. Exams are over!

I’m never ever EVER going to sit for another accounts/biology/physics/geography etc etc paper!


Three heart ranching and stomach turning years had finally come to an end. The days of cramming and forcing information down my throat, only to go bulimic and vomit it all out during the exams are over.

I feel a sense of relief and freedom coursing through my veins, and yet…..

I have this funny sensation in the pit of my stomach. Swirls of the past upsets me and my tumtum as I realised how different things are going to be from this day forth. I mean, I WON’T start school next jan. I WON’T be wearing a school uniform next year onwards. I WON’T be close to some of my friends as destiny seperates us.And I WON’T be a high school student anymore.

Is it more than just anticipating the change that I have this dark feeling in me? Is it because I can’t seem to let go?That I felt I didn’t do my best. That I’m not ready for a change? Am I scared to move on? Or do I just need to shyte so badly?(since my tummy hurt that much :/)

I thought writting this post would clear whatever it was on my mind these past few days, but it didn’t. I’m still confused – and maybe even more so now- as to why I feel this way.

I always though I was ready to get out of high school, start anew and all that bullcrap. But now, I don’t know. WHY THE FUCK DO I FEEL THIS WAY??!!!

It’s just soo fwasstrating.

But I know I can’t harbor onto the past. I gotta keep going and move on. I can’t get stuck in high school all my life. Or at least I know I don’t want to.

Maybe it’s just knowing how much things are going to change disarrays me a tad bit. BUT I think (well, hope) I’ll adapt like I usually do.

Saying that does make me feel less afraid of my impending future. Slightly.

oh fuckit, I’m just going to enjoy my break while it last and not bother about this. I can’t possibly address every single thing that’s wrong with me. There’s too much!

Well then, with things brushed under the rug, all I can say is hopefully I’ll blog more.

zzzzzzzzzzz,(‘cos I don’t do x’s and o’s)


p.s I don’t get myself. why was writting this post so awkward when my other post(on another blog) wasn’t?

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